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Blog: Road Rage, Chronic Complainer & The Great White North

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  • Blog: Road Rage, Chronic Complainer & The Great White North

    So I leave the crib today in a driving rain storm, which I HATE driving in. I get to a double Left turn lane on HWY50 to go to Waterford Lakes to get a burger and cocktails at Orlando Ale House. After the left turn the road melds into 1 lane so you merge. Everyone knows how it works...until today. This stooopid mother fucker in a giant Navigator sees my turn signal, (which nobody uses because it's understood you have to merge), and races up on me laying on their horn. Now I have to assume this is a woman because most men just don't act that stoopid in a big assed boat. But I don't know. Whoever it is runs up alongside my right, hitting the curb, drops back, then tries to take me out on the left. Almost head-ons into oncoming traffic before dropping back again. And this is all in a fucking rain storm. At tyhis point I'm concerned this psychotic idiot is going to put me on the evening news. Luckily, she turned off 1 driveway into Waterford before mine. Whew. Arrive at the Ale House unscathed, order my fare and bloop, a guy bellys up to the bar right next to me. Now, this bar seats like 40 people and there's only me & 4 others. So this guy gets Iced tea. Calls the bar keep back and bitches that it's not sweet enough. So he gets another. I'm ordering my food and the fuckhead interrupts my bidness to bitch that the Teas is too sweet. He says he doesn't want it too plain or too sweet, just right in the groove. Now I'm thinking, "Why don't you kiss my fucking ass? Not on the left side, not on the right side but right in the groove". Anyway, the manager delivers him another tea, guy says it's OK. Then proceeds to take the 2 previous teas and mix them all together. Spills shit all over the bar. I get to thinking that maybe this retard is the person trying to kill me with the fucking Navigator. To distract myself I look across the bar and see this...



    I thought it was fucking megman & reservoir dog. It's like 90 degrees, humid as fuck and these tourist looking fucks are wearing hozzel hats! I'm lmao trying to tell the bar keep, who's all of about 23 about "The Great WhiteNorth". He's looking at me like I'M out of my mind.

    So anyways, that's a rainy day in my life but I'm much better now.

  • #2
    csb

    Comment


    • #3
      ty

      Comment


      • #4
        Take off hoser.

        Comment


        • #5
          inorite? I wanted to paraphrase that to the barkeep. All I could come up with was "Hello US of America...eh"? No wonder the guy thought I was retarded

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by s.murph View Post
            So I leave the crib today in a driving rain storm, which I HATE driving in. I get to a double Left turn lane on HWY50 to go to Waterford Lakes to get a burger and cocktails at Orlando Ale House. After the left turn the road melds into 1 lane so you merge. Everyone knows how it works...until today. This stooopid mother fucker in a giant Navigator sees my turn signal, (which nobody uses because it's understood you have to merge), and races up on me laying on their horn. Now I have to assume this is a woman because most men just don't act that stoopid in a big assed boat. But I don't know. Whoever it is runs up alongside my right, hitting the curb, drops back, then tries to take me out on the left. Almost head-ons into oncoming traffic before dropping back again. And this is all in a fucking rain storm. At tyhis point I'm concerned this psychotic idiot is going to put me on the evening news. Luckily, she turned off 1 driveway into Waterford before mine. Whew. Arrive at the Ale House unscathed, order my fare and bloop, a guy bellys up to the bar right next to me. Now, this bar seats like 40 people and there's only me & 4 others. So this guy gets Iced tea. Calls the bar keep back and bitches that it's not sweet enough. So he gets another. I'm ordering my food and the fuckhead interrupts my bidness to bitch that the Teas is too sweet. He says he doesn't want it too plain or too sweet, just right in the groove. Now I'm thinking, "Why don't you kiss my fucking ass? Not on the left side, not on the right side but right in the groove". Anyway, the manager delivers him another tea, guy says it's OK. Then proceeds to take the 2 previous teas and mix them all together. Spills shit all over the bar. I get to thinking that maybe this retard is the person trying to kill me with the fucking Navigator. To distract myself I look across the bar and see this...



            I thought it was fucking megman & reservoir dog. It's like 90 degrees, humid as fuck and these tourist looking fucks are wearing hozzel hats! I'm lmao trying to tell the bar keep, who's all of about 23 about "The Great WhiteNorth". He's looking at me like I'M out of my mind.

            So anyways, that's a rainy day in my life but I'm much better now.
            I'm not reading all that. Can anybody give me the cliff notes. Thanks. With OP, can just assume something didn't go as planned.

            Comment


            • #7
              Folds up toilet paper, *tosses*

              Comment


              • #8
                Holy shit. buttons is blasted,

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by WTexasCrude View Post

                  I'm not reading all that. Can anybody give me the cliff notes. Thanks. With OP, can just assume something didn't go as planned.
                  This is why you go through life without the whole fucking story. You have the attention span of a 4 year old...no offense

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by s.murph View Post
                    So I leave the crib today in a driving rain storm, which I HATE driving in. I get to a double Left turn lane on HWY50 to go to Waterford Lakes to get a burger and cocktails at Orlando Ale House. After the left turn the road melds into 1 lane so you merge. Everyone knows how it works...until today. This stooopid mother fucker in a giant Navigator sees my turn signal, (which nobody uses because it's understood you have to merge), and races up on me laying on their horn. Now I have to assume this is a woman because most men just don't act that stoopid in a big assed boat. But I don't know. Whoever it is runs up alongside my right, hitting the curb, drops back, then tries to take me out on the left. Almost head-ons into oncoming traffic before dropping back again. And this is all in a fucking rain storm. At tyhis point I'm concerned this psychotic idiot is going to put me on the evening news. Luckily, she turned off 1 driveway into Waterford before mine. Whew. Arrive at the Ale House unscathed, order my fare and bloop, a guy bellys up to the bar right next to me. Now, this bar seats like 40 people and there's only me & 4 others. So this guy gets Iced tea. Calls the bar keep back and bitches that it's not sweet enough. So he gets another. I'm ordering my food and the fuckhead interrupts my bidness to bitch that the Teas is too sweet. He says he doesn't want it too plain or too sweet, just right in the groove. Now I'm thinking, "Why don't you kiss my fucking ass? Not on the left side, not on the right side but right in the groove". Anyway, the manager delivers him another tea, guy says it's OK. Then proceeds to take the 2 previous teas and mix them all together. Spills shit all over the bar. I get to thinking that maybe this retard is the person trying to kill me with the fucking Navigator. To distract myself I look across the bar and see this...



                    I thought it was fucking megman & reservoir dog. It's like 90 degrees, humid as fuck and these tourist looking fucks are wearing hozzel hats! I'm lmao trying to tell the bar keep, who's all of about 23 about "The Great WhiteNorth". He's looking at me like I'M out of my mind.

                    So anyways, that's a rainy day in my life but I'm much better now.
                    I was expecting more info on I what thought was going to be a bar fight, did you have sense to separate yourself quickly from Mr. T?

                    Is there a Hair Club for Men next to the bar?

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by beantown23 View Post

                      I was expecting more info on I what thought was going to be a bar fight, did you have sense to separate yourself quickly from Mr. T?

                      I s there a Hair Club for Men next to the bar?
                      Does your wife drive a Navigator?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by s.murph View Post

                        Does your wife drive a Navigator?
                        Not since I ran her over with the Suburban.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Even though it means I live near Pine Hills, it also means I don't have to deal with the petty bullshit of living (or trying to) over in your side of town.

                          West side of Orange County >>> East side of Orange County. Any day!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Should have said something like..."Man, you should have this asshole I was driving behind on the way here!" That way he feels like an asshole and he doesnt know it was you in the other car.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by WTexasCrude View Post
                              Holy shit. buttons is Blasted,
                              The fuck he is! My troll would be much more amusing and coherent.

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